A grasshopper’s view of an ancient fable

An ancient fable updated by Karabar. As he says: “This one is a little different. Two Different Versions. Two Different Morals.” First the original, then the modern.

OLD VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house, and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out.

MORAL OF THE OLD STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

That’s the story that we have been telling each other for 2500 years. Does it get told any more? Who knows, but that is how things look from the perspective of the ant. We now need to see things from the perspective of the grasshopper.

MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.

Their ABC, the Fairfax Press, Getup, and Crikey show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. Australia is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on ABC News with Sally Sara and Wendy Harmer along with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, ‘It’s Not Easy Being Green.’ Fran Kelly sings Kumbaya with the Grasshopper and his mates at Breakfast on RN.

Getup stages a demonstration in front of the ant’s house where the news stations film the group singing, ‘We Shall Overcome.’

Then, Sarah Sea Patrol has the group kneel down to pray for the grasshopper’s sake. Jay Weatherill condemns the ant and blames Prime Minister Turnbull, former PM Tony Abbott, Josh Frydenberg, Eric Abetz, Kevin Andrews, George Christensen, and Craig Kelly for the Grasshopper’s’ plight.

Tony Burke and Bill Shorten explain in an interview with Sarah Ferguson that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the ALP and the Greens in the senate draft the Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Queensland’s Palace Cook, and given to the grasshopper.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant’s food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant’s old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn’t maintain It.

The ant has disappeared in the Snowy Mountains never to be seen again.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize and ramshackle the once prosperous and peaceful neighbourhood.

The entire nation’s economy collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Be careful how you vote in the next election.

You may wish to pass this on to other ants, but don’t bother sending it on to any grasshoppers because they wouldn’t understand it, anyway.

AND THE STORY CONTINUES: from Ricky Gervais via mh, this time involving mice.

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